...seriously? chocolate pudding? motorboating? No one has even done that to ME and i am 69 times the whore you are
Some chick in the back of my Psychologhy of Addictions class just did a line off her hand. She tried to make it look subtle.
So, remember how that one doctor said it was 1 in a million that I'd get pregnant...
Yeeah thank god
Well..welcome to parenting Mr. one in a million.
Beach body diet is off. Pizza hut worked its way back onto my google chrome top 8
If this herpes test comes back negative I'm asking out the doctor.
Either way, he made a blog for his cat.
I think a 5 ft pyramid of jello shots in honor of the egyptians is in order
Just had a flashback of dry humping a man lying in the street while Jim (dressed as santa) screams 'HAVE YOU BEEN A GOOD BOY?!'
hot buttered vodka was not a success. on any level.
You could become Eskimo brothers with my dad. How can you pass that up? You pussy.
I can't even properly respond cuz I'm ballsdeep in falafel
I woke up on his couch and my bra was flung across the floor and filled with animal crackers
dropping lines from Workaholics has slowly become my icebreaker when hitting on girls. who would have thought "lets get weird" would cause girls to actually get weird
BTW, does Anne know that we used the lipstick she is currently wearing to was used to write the word "ASS" on my ass cheeks last night?
Due to this morning's events my new porn name is Reepa Nipplov.
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