I must say your penis is just as photogenic as you
you kept thanking chef boyardee for having pull tab cans
Thats not what we're looking for. I want this kid to suck a lolly pop out of a stripper's snatch.
How did "just two beers for happy hour" turn into naked backyard wrestling?
She's on her way over to shave my year round sweater vest into a festive argyle sweater vest. Keeper?
My boobs are feeling quite sensitive so I told them, " you is smart, you is kind, you is important" that should do the trick.
I'm sure you can think of a way to make money.. God didn't give you boobs that awesome to waste them feeding your children..
I think there's an ice cream truck out back, but there's no way I can get pants on in time to catch it
the amount I squirted last night was insane. Im glad i ignored tlc's advice, i went chasing waterfalls and loved every god damn minute of it.
He sent me a blank text message. That's a booty call waiting to happen
Fuck you know you drunk when you start signing the Masson impossjvke song to entourage yourself to pee
he yelled at me like a drill sergeant while I quickly tried to take off my pants
the last i saw he was butt naked on the top deck of the bus trying to conduct a drunken choir so i really have no idea
He's just been a dick since he set his face on fire. I just wanted to eat a fucking hot dog.
Dude, don't beat around the bush. We're fucked and you know it.
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