Spaghetti and Car Bombs, good idea or what will end up on the bar in a few minutes?
He's at the gym. He likes to get high and swim cause it makes him feel like a fish.
i want to get drunk and sing the national anthem on your roof again please.
What are you doing St Patricks day? I'm banned from all work parties with open bar ever since the cinco de mayo party that I dumped a drink on my co-workers head and played air guitar on my boss' ankle cast.
I don't drink so I see St. Patty's as an LSD type of day. Its like a more hardcore 420
i refuse to hook up with a girl that looks like drew carey.
I'm in the middle no shirt white shorts humping the white dustbuster next to the guy shooting off the tazer infront of the two guys humping on the bicycle
Part of me really wants this picture, but the other part of me knows if he is really this drunk, he could be sodomizing a lamp and not know it
I'm just trying my hardest not to get addicted to drugs or pregnant and all your other friends are out there getting married
I really should have gone with the man who kept offering me cocaine. Why did I chose the German!? STUPID!
He made me cum via FaceTime, then he made me look at his stock investment charts..
I was going to say that I wasn't sure how that happened... but then I remembered that I bonded with the Australians over vitamins and INXS and they bought me tequila.
I'd just like to take a moment now to apologize sincerely for getting drunk and making an as of myself at your Christmas party next week. I'm especially sorry for sleeping with your baby sister.
I ate all your munchie Mac and Cheese cause you left me on the lawn. If you don't want it to happen gain, drag my drunk ass inside next time
I'm just bringing him "breakfast," and breakfast may lead to lunch and dinner, but that doesn't mean I want the mealplan.
Randomize
