Yeah he is here but I can't let him know I am until he has like 30 min worth of drinks. so when he see me he isn't like "omg ew,NO!"
I have so much to learn from you, wise slut
she said your name and I thought she was asking me to motorboat her. Best. Miscommunication.Ever.
bio was interesting today. swabbed my mouth to see what the cells where, ha. found a sperm cell. he was just that awesome
She gave me a blow job and her mom gave me blueberry muffin afterwards. I love them.
New rule : you aren't allowed anything . Ever .
I'm starting to blur the boundary between reasonable senioritis and self-destruction. Somewhat-openly hittin the flask in 11am class
Im thinking about quitting weed for my dog
Seriously? He's going to use MY birthday sex as the opportunity to ask if he can pee on me?!? I let him, but wow talk about selfish.
He has in a pan: ten pieces of bacon, two cloves of garlic, an egg (not scrambled or hard boiled, just an egg) and frozen corn.
He played pinball with my ovaries. He won.
It's like your tits told gravity 'fuck you, I'm fine right here!'
There was nowhere else for me to go. I'm like the island of misfit toys but I'm hot.
Adulthood is weird i just cleared a check larger than my gross income from 2011 but i also just did coke during my lunch break
I'm out of breath and my thighs burn but at least it's over.
I just woke up in a prom dress on your bathroom floor, yea I'm 32.
Randomize
