I got three cases. When they asked for id I said it was suspended for drunk driving.
I hate the hobo that sits outside our building
Joe or Chris?
do i even wanna kno y u kno their names?
well i came home drunk one night and Chris offered me a beer as i was coming in, it was kinda weird but i wasn't goin to deny a free beer. you're proolly talkin about Joe though, he's the one with the fucked up eye.
he just ordered a side of pineapple and winked at me. too much for a first date. come get me.
So i know you wont get this until you land, but if i'm late its cause i was having sex. being blunt and hope that explains things.
On an unrelated note, i found out who duct taped shoelaces to my face
nothing says roomie bonding better than a sunday shroom trip.
Just slept with a female bodybuilder. not cute. but it was like fucking hulk hogan with a twat. Beastly.
im so disgusted with myself. funny thing was i lasted 15 seconds. she benches 325
And by sexy pictures I mean pictures of my penis in strange places. I rock out with my cock out.
It's a pretty amazing thing to watch... He used "Rad tits" as his pick up line of the night. And it worked... 3 times
How am I feeling this morning? Well, besides the fact that my vagina looks like a pair of giraffe's lips and I'm walking like an over-confident cowgirl, I'm fantastic. Thanks for your concern.
There was another blizzard last night and at one point I was drinking 3 beers at once. Driving home didn't seem like a wise option
Well once I told her I had a girlfriend she actually got more aggressive. Then Danielle called me and she saw the pic of the two of us on my phone and immediately said "can my caller I'd pic be me sitting on your face" wtf?
Holy shit, I just successfully took and sent a boob pic AT MY DESK I have conquered an entire new level of skill.
now that we broke up we are playing hot potato with the cock ring.. Poor thing just needs a home
My Hitachi broke 1 day into this stay home bullshit.
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