bad to tell him im pregnant over fbook chat?
lets make a pact to never make a pregnancy pact
there's only 1 girl at Mount St Mary that's a virgin. the Mary statue standing outside
Katy Perry is on a Proactiv commercial. That "I kissed a girl" shit is so much less hot now.
I came home to burning cookies and him outside "tanning" naked.
He just wants an even tan
She went into the basement and sang to my cat for three hours....she actually has a beautiful voice....
the best sex is "duke just lost" sex.
I legit had to pull him off my car. Then he texted me saying 'take me places.' Shotgun getting that drunk tonight
Could someone please explain the rug burn on the right side of my face and do I need a shot of penicillin?
the cops were hovering over him then shinned a flashlight to the floor above ours, then I realized that some fucker jumped from the third story.
fuck our hall.
The picture that pops up when I call her phone is a picture of my nipple. Just so you're forewarned.
So it's national ass day?! I love October. No bra last Saturday and now ass day. This is my month. God is dedicating this October to me!
You chugged 6 beers in a row and then outed your boss at a party last night.
I gave him a BJ and he left. Coincidentally that's the name of my memoir.
Who the fuck gets injured on a merry-go-round? HOW IS IT POSSIBLE??
Randomize
