Best moment of my life. I just got a text from some random number that said i can't wait to touch you. Her name is kiara and she had the wrong number.
Just think about it this way, every time you work Sunday, it's another $75 and that equals another hooker when we go to Amsterdam.
Barack Obama mentioned plan B and suddenly this address seems a lot more personal
he left his wallet here so lets treat ourselves to a lunch for the lack of penis we both had deal with
I give him a gold star every time I orgasm. His room looks like he's freaking King Midas.
I feel like an ass. I'm not blacking out ever again. I want to clean your feet for a year. Just like Jesus did.
Dude, I found out having naked people in your car is a felony.. Now were all fucked.
I'm sorry, you might have to start setting aside some time in your day for my pussy.
She's going to be the first to die of too much illness. Not even super bad stuff like cancer but like for having a cold at the same time as a sore throat and chlamydia or something. Just too much diseases.
I don't know how it happened. All I did was tell her I was impressed by her presentation. Her nail marks on my back ain't going away anytime soon.
On another note; I'm three days away from being 1/12th of my way from not having sex for a year. I need to get laid.
No dude. I can't think of anything LESS sexy than yodeling
Blacked in cold and wet, with them areound me singing Aaaaall we are saaaaayiiiing is YOU PEED YOUR PANTS
And don't worry, I have a great track record of rallying after a casual midday blackout.
half way down the stairs my legs said fuck this and i just fell the rest of the way...
Randomize
