Id pretty much put it in anything at this point. Jello. Dogs. 12 year old boys
i need to know the scientific term for a guy's taint so i can explain what i did last night.
When I came home you were using a glowstick to eat peanut butter from the jar.
She said I walked up to the McDonalds counter and ordered just a cup full of pickles then proceeded to offer some to everyone in the place.
I woke him up this morning and said I have a meeting w my advisor in an hour you need to wake up, cum on my face, and take me to my car.
i'm pregaming while finishing a paper on cardio myocyte contractility in mice. i'm kicking finals week's ass right now
I WILL MAKE A FLYING LEAP FOR YOUR DICK WHEN I SEE YOU THROUGH THE WINDOW
Too high to move please buy hi-c and pour it in my mouth in exchange I will marry your first born child
At one point, you closed your eyes and asked me which 'six flags' we were at
Because Kyle had a tattoo kit at his house and I wanted one and all he could draw was a mustache or a stickman on fire
He asked me the next morning if he fell asleep inside of me. Drunk is an understatement.
My stuff that was at your place last night smells like doughnuts. I'm not even mad.
there's fucking coffee grinds packed all inside my pipe. what did i do
I need you to know I’m weirdly very sexually attracted to Charlie Puth now
AND ONCE AGAIN THE HENNESSEY MAKES ME A SUPER SAIYAN
Oh for fuck's sake, is that why the couch is in the pool???
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