You think ghandi was good in the sack? cuz i sure do.
I'm not gay.
Soooo you want ghandi? is that what your telling me?
If ghandi gives good head...I'm in
Its fine.
you'd be confused too if you woke up to pictures of a ghostbuster doing body shots off you.
I made a vision board specifically for the purpose of boning john mayer.
what date should I let him know how fucked up I am?
i like him when i'm sober AND when i'm drunk.i've been searching for this my whole life
Guess which frat house I just walked out of! And on a related note... guess who's uncircumsized
David pulled a magic mike again and started stripping on every street sign we passed.
I'm not even mad. I was just trying to get a boner, you're the one that had to see that
He's doing his thing where I don't know if he's alive until three in the afternoon so idk
THIS IS WHY I WENT TO SCHOOL FOR TO BE A COSMETOLOGIST TO HELP MY EX BOYFRIENDS CURRENT GIRLFRIEND BE MILDLY ATTRACTIVE... Everything DOES happen for a reason
your life is going to be an empowering working mom montage tomorrow to Katy P's ROAR... --are you living in a yoplaít comercial?
He's hot and has an accent therefore you don't ask questions when he tells you to take your pants off.
ya I had reallllllly good sex last night too that will probably get me evicted
learning about efficiency and effectiveness in an administration seminar. real world application: walking across the street to the pub on break to shotgun a beer.
I just found a ladybug shell in my underwear. What was I doing last night?
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