bobby jindal makes me wanna cover my ears. you make me wanna smile.
My family is watching Intervention and taking notes. I need to leave NOW!
Fuck positive energy. I choose drinking instead,
Apparently having him hold an open book in front of me while i'm blowing him doesn't count as studying...
My warmest regards to the fish in that koi pond I puked in.
at the last minute we also decided to throw an egg in the beer bong. and he drank it, shell and all.
I am definitely the only sober one on this train. And the only one not wearing a business suit. Wow, Monday Korea.
Between the walk of shame, bar fight, karaoke, injuries, number of bar check-ins, and variety/quantity of alcohols and Advil consumed, I'd say HookerFest 2012 was a raging success.
You'd think the neighbors would be used to grown men coming into my house drunk at 230 am.
He snapchatted me the wine on the ceiling this morning
I flashed the bar tender last night. Apparently I wanted a whiskey to go and that was the golden ticket. This is why I never come home
I re-seduced my fuck buddy...must be the luck of the Irish!
I agree with that homeless guy though, you do need a haircut
I covered the puke with a shingle there's not many chunks. I think it will blend quickly.
Remember that time we were together? Yeah, I don't miss that.
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