grinding to god bless the USA? really?
shut up
We are walking down to the lake and then i dont know. Where did you sleep?
Places.
Plural? Please tell.
She said so on her MySpace, so it's gotta be true.
I decided to name my penis gatorade...is it in you?
I knew my chances of getting laid had increased after she walked into my room and yelled "DICK TIME"
Vodka infused whipped cream. Shit just got real.
I really like you, but I want to get to know you on a time when I am not at drugs.
If I started a story with "That three-year-old totally deserved it," would you listen?
I think I've lost the thrill of being a slut. It's just that the newness has worn off, I think.
He probably has his cowboy hat on, that's his house hat.
You've been drinking wine and eating bacon all afternoon. HOW IS THAT DOING GOOD?!?!
At 12:16 am. We just got out of the truck and went behind it and fucked. With 3 people in the truck. On the side of the road. As cars drove by.
So my parents just watched me pour their rum into a bottle and only add crystal light powder, no water... Talk about being judged. All I could say was "Cortland tricks?"
The cop looked me right in the eye and apologized for cock blocking me.
I just realized that this is the first time I've ever seen your mom without sucking your cock.
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