shes the kind of girl i dont like to talk to unless my penis is in her mouth.
Last day of classes. 1st day attending every class. I'm proud of myself
i was trying to find the best way to say come over and have sex, without saying it.
When black out puking doesn't involve crying and promises to never get drunk again... to just a subtle, 'excuse me while I go vomit in the bathroom of this bar'.. you know you've finally grown up.
your dad just showed up on the golfcart with a keg. i. love. our. neighborhood.
I don't think I have ever puked up that much free breakfast in my life...thank god for Nickle Beers.
i'm not a hellocoptur, but youer in a dorm ans im un a dorm
She's got a butler. A fucking butler. Shes like batman, but with a better ass.
It was almost as bad as the time I peed on the floor of the Pentagon's subway station.
Whether ya want it or not, it's gonna happen. Assimilate to the gay
No. You're getting a Viking funeral and I'm pawning your shit.
Woke up snuggling with a large wooden rhino that I stole last night...obviously, we had fun.
I hooked up with a sophomore, passed out at midnight, and apparently drunkenly peed on Nicole's wedding invitation
Okay so as of now, we may either be coming for one night, two nights, or not at all this weekend. It depends on Laura's toe and if I get my period. Will explain later
The fuck kind of sorcerer makes a pact with tequila
Most of the people I know from AA
Haha touché
Randomize
