I DON'T KNOW WHERE WE ARE WE ARE TOO FUCKING ELEVATED.
Me either! Fuck yeah, 12th and something. 12th and hamburger stand.
so the guy who showed me the apt today is now texting me and asking me out for drinks...he's at least 20 yrs oldr than me and highlights his hair, but part of me is wondering how low i can talk him down in rent during sex? wrong?
she always made me post sex PB&Js it was like fucking a trashier Martha Stewart
Had a dream I was a monkey and smoked pot out of a bong made out of a tree
I was also standing on my bed with a road cone pounding on the ceiling at 3am. Not sure why
She said to bring taco sauce. Hoping that's a euphemism.
I wish you could be here to assess my herpes before he gets here.
Also, I would just like to reiterate my apologies for tearing up in the grocery store.
She had a glow in the dark pastie on her forehead the last time I saw her. That should help you find her.
I'm sitting next to the guy that peed in our drying machine
i wasnt sure i had a crush on her until i woke up this morning and saw i had googled fifteen variations of "lesbian marriage in estonia". where the fuck is estonia
The body is still out there. I don't think my trainer realized when he asked me not to drink for 24 days, how often I see dead people
I just used my sisters cheerleading plaque and a children's book to crush up painkillers to snort. Happy Friday
Why do I feel so obligated to masterbate just because I’m single and it’s valentines Day...
He started planning our future mid-hookup. You tell me how my night was.
Randomize