I swear to god Kristen, if this "cute" guy you are trying to hook up with's friend asks me if we can role play, and I play his mother one more time, Im leaving. You have 3 minutes to save me or I am out.
What should our trivia night team be named?
Define Statutory
You should come over. I am making a celebratory I got laid by a huge penis cake.
There aren't nearly as many guys masturbating on chatroulette as i was led to believe...i feel cheated
He'd bedazzaled his ass. Im not even that gay...
I woke up on a futon in some strangers house. They were eating pizza and told me everything was going to be fine.
Fuck you. You would only tell me how to get to your house in Spanish.
just walked into the study room and found an empty bottle of vodka and a passed out freshman. Did you have anything to do with this?
I just want to have such an intense orgasm that my heart stops and I die. I mean that would kind of suck for the guy I'm fucking but then again he could be like "I'm that good"
iphones do not disturb setting is the biggest cock block to my 3am booty calls
He licked my mouth. I felt like I was making out with my dog.
I can't believe he's mad at you for not remembering your fake anniversary.
We did hand stuff while watching teenage mutant ninja turtles so I guess you could say it's getting serious
Dealing with people is so much easier after you've had an orgasm or 4.
She shit herself again. We're calling her the "Queen of Sharts".
Randomize
