More tranny stories later!
I've come to notice a late period isn't as exciting when you have no reason to worry
I mean I found and stalk his moms facebook.. that obsessed.
okay so i know you are missing your wallet but at least its not your tooth. i am missing my tooth.
I found a sock full of anal beads in my dryer. At least she washes them.
If he thought that flying across an ocean to visit me in London constituted sex, he thought wrong.
Side note, we are 25 fighting over our sophmore year RAs Drunk facebook attention
Why do the people I hook up with still exist after we're done?
They can be so fun, drunk bruises are like clues to the treasure of what actually happened last night. "why do I have a bruise on my belly button? oh right. i was trying to turn my stomach off so I would stop throwing up."
This drunk girl wants you to know that I do actually like you. I'm not just using you for sex. I think you're cool.
Getting drunk in an Applebee's pray for me
Lord god protect this child
Would you go as one half of Harry and Lloyd in Tuxes to Aaron's wedding?
He named his newborn baby after a character in the Hobbit and that is literally keeping me up at night.
the last thing is remember is that strange guy in the leotard...i woke up in my bed, naked, with a half eaten grilled cheese on my nightstand, a six pack in the fridge, a new pack of cigarettes on my pillow and coke in my purse. apparently i bought some drugs, shopped and cooked. typical.
We couldnt find you anywhere and when you finally answered your phone all you said was "im safe"
Randomize
