I slayed a troll last night at BC guess i thought i was back in college
Dual, econ, hell, shiv, aunt, puppy. 1 out of 6. T9 word needs to learn how to cuss like me.
my vagina has a 5:00 shadow
i just used the Cadillac of toilet papers. For a minute i actually forgot i was even wiping my ass....i thought i was floating butt first into heaven
she always made me post sex PB&Js it was like fucking a trashier Martha Stewart
my history teacher totally just suggested that we record his lectures and play drinking games with them later so that we pay attention to the material.
Class is significantly more awkward when you know that your teacher knows what you look like with your legs behind your head... Just saying.
By the way, thank you for feeding me fries when I was sitting on the floor.
I might lose an organ but I've got booze. I'll be fine.
Once he blows his load, he's more of an immediate flight risk than that jetBlue pilot. He's out the door before his cum is out of my vajayjay.
I'm eating cheerios out of the palm of my hand while I pee with the door open. Is this adulthood?
Oh that could end badly if you get them mixed up.. you know who I think you should focus on?? THE ONE WITH THE BIG BLACK COCK, just sayin
all night she kept rolling over and mumbling something about wanting an extendable retractable urethra.
I woke up not knowing what state I was in. Turns out, people from Deleware are pretty helpful.
No, I told him I was busy again this weekend. Eventually he’ll learn. Plus, absence makes the cock grow harder
Randomize
