her vagina looked like a handful of raisins.
chicago's viagra triangle is not unlike the bermuda triangle in thatt things just get lost...... planes, ships, dignity, virginity, etc.
her tits were misleading. turns out she wasn't cool, smart and funny
We woke up in an inflatable kiddie pool full of both empty and full beer cans. In the middle of his dad's office. Oh, and we were locked in. Nobody remembers.
So when you said you wanted to make a clay replica of my boobs and hang it above your bed you actually meant it?
How much did you drink?
Enough to be hungover and still think roller coasters were a good idea
I want him to rummage through my vagina. with unwashed hands.
wellllllll.... I literally just puked in my mouth so perhaps this is not the epic love connection I believed it to be 3 minutes ago.
After we had sex he made me watch a Top Gun highlight video...
I stood on the corner waiting to be picked up, dry heaving, and trying to block out the sun.
dude, I convinced you I was your conscience for like 15 minutes last night. you weren't just "a little high"
I found a blow up pig at an adult store. He will have to fuck that on video if he wants anal. Also, I bought a pair of clear high heels. Tell your brother I love him.
Turns out the creepy dude who bought us tequila shots was the friend of a friend who then got us a table and several large bottles of champagne.
Never judge a man by his mustache.
Would it be totally wrong, that in honor of princess leias death, I role played as her??
Are you really trying to argue your case that you seduced my cat?
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