I have a hot bod, but my face sucks, what can i do?
1 of the best things of being a business owner is I don't get fired for having sex in the office
I'm seeing double. Its like being in a room full of people
season finale of lost and an oz of weed. tonight my mind is going to be blown.
It just gets louder and louder too...dear god. Her poor vagina.
You used up your allotted blow job minutes for the month of April last night anyways
Did i tell you my idea for my life plan? Not the one that involves stripping.
before the moonshine you were already braiding the bouncers beard -_-
I'm gonna go to bars and pick up women hopped up on democracy.
He is dating a girl who is on the Olympic shooting team...I've never been so scared to hit on a guy with a girlfriend in my entire life.
in other news i got caramel vodka poured on me. upside, i smell amazing
he keeps various drugs in his kitchen cupboard like groceries. that is my new life goal as an adult.
WHEN YOU HAVE SEX WITH A GUY FROM A DIFFERENT COUNTRY YOURE SUPPOSED TO NEVER SEE THEM AGAIN
It's going to turn into you and me throwing down in a devastating lip-synch battle while everyone else stands around awkwardly.
I'm sorry for chipping my tooth on your vagina last night :(
Randomize
