i feel like the prize bull at the rodeo. everybody got a ride, no one lasted more than 8 seconds and i'm pretty sure i kicked one of them in the ball sack
Whatever it was. it was pregnant.
This lady in my dui class just asked what patron was. I feel like she doesn't belong here
my mom just told me its unladylike to have toothpaste stains on my clothes all the time.. if she only knew.
She looks like a junkie muppet...awful
since when did our medecine drawer and our sex drawer become the same drawer? we now have lube covered cough drops.
the saddest part is, this is not even the first time i've woken up in a shopping cart with a concussion.
I was paranoid that someone would jizz in my hair while I had the cucumbers over my eyes. Super-High Spa Day didnt work out.
I didn't think four grown drunk men could cuddle on a twin size bed, but we found a way.
You got kicked out after 30 minutes, 3 beers and 2 shots. Group record. Also you kept rubbing his belly and calling him buddha.
It makes showers more interesting trying to drink a gin and tonic and keep soap out of my eyes at the same time.
You need to calm down.
Her tits are absolutely massive. Like ripleys believe it or not shit
I will consider it. I need to determine if ogling him is worth almost certain death via zipline.
Sabotage it. Cum quick. Make it awkward so you don't hurt her feelings. Who says nice guys finish last?
you have to get here a cop came into the bar and she looks like Sarah Palin. I think I'm gonna try and bang her
Randomize