if creeping was an olympic sport, i would be a lock for the gold right now.
Well we ran into the cornfields when the cops got there. We'd been hiding in there for 45 mins when he asks me "So this wasn't exactly how I'd planned this but I thought I'd ask. How do you feel about oral sex?"
Santa Clause just drove by me on a fire truck. Epic night begins.
Don't worry we didnt bang. Sometimes I just bring guys home so I don't order pizza.
I'll call you tomorrow. I'm ok and back i love you goodnight.
I stole a bike. Here's a pic
there is no amount of schooling that prepares you for when your morbidly obese 45 year old patient tells you she has her clit pierced.
You came in as I got off work, ordered us jack and cokes. Put them on my tab, and then proceeded to fall asleep on the bar.
I didnt realize how badly my legs were scratched up from power-fucking him in the bushes until kate dumped a bottle of vodka on me. that shit burnedddd
Slip and slide hallway was not one of my better ideas.
We were fucking in the boat on the lake when another boat saw us and honked their appreciation.
I mentioned the porn thing he mentioned a brother it all kinda just came together
Lost and found: pink cotton underwear next to my bed and soaking wet Reebok socks or boxers in a plastic bag...in my fridge🤔
The list of people who didn't throw up last night is insanely smaller than the list of people who did
So it was a successful night I take it?
She started crying because the Rugrats grew up
Topless, eating sour gummies, doing a crossword, at 4 AM. TELL ME IM BEAUTIFUL!
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