My balls are about to become a huge part of your mouth's life
I served up a girl her first a2m the other day. You would have been proud.
the line for where the wild things are looks like radiohead had sex with an urban outfitters
He had an itunes playlist named "def not Glee season 1" which contained all of Glee season 1
all i wanna do is slam about 38 beers eat a whole pizza and wake up naked in the taco bell parking lot
remember what we learned. dont lure girls w/ food at the bar. u dont want those ones
the only time i'm productive on weed is when i drink.
He had a seizure when i was giving him head. for a second i was thinking i was doing a spectacular job
I'm sorry that I didn't get belligerently drunk and did not put my penis on your neck again
This Alex the guy who suck your belly ring
Cool. I might be making a sickly but incredibly well dressed wine drunk appearance in a couple hours
He has a baby picture of himself on the night stand. I don't think this whole 'one night stand' thing is for me.
SPICY FOODS AND BLOWJOBS DON'T MIX.
YOU SAID YOU'D TRY ANYTHING ONCE YOU LIAR
Well I've decided to refuse to conform to society and be naked the rest of the day.
I don’t care if there’s a pandemic. My husband gave me a hall pass for my 40th birthday and I’m going to use it!
Randomize
