JoAnns office is warmer than mine. . .it must be because she has the gateway to hell under her desk.
I have one brief flash of having his dick in my hand. that's all I remember.
strike ten. I need to stop drinkng
so was this before or after i puked down the ice luge?
What kind of flower means "I want to have unprotected sex with you, preferably from behind?" because thats the message I'd really like to send on Valentines Day
I just saw at least a dozen senior citizens on roller blades. way to drunk for this.
the arrest was probably divine intervention, cause i think we were heading to an ill-advised threesome.
How many folks do you know who bring coke to a dinner party. Seriously.
While I faked being asleep, he literally prayed to God out loud, asking for forgiveness for losing his virginity before marriage.
I'm not proud of how I threatened that 8 year old during drunken laser tag
I woke up to him yelling "WHO SLEEPS WITH A BEER IN THEIR HAND?!?" this of course, startled me awake and made me spill the aforementioned beer. So I guess the a answer is- not this girl, not anymore. Asshole
Apparently I made a stripper cry last night when I paid her $10 to go away
I peed sitting down because I knew standing was a lost cause
Got an egg Mcmuffin combo, and put the hash brown in the sandwich. That level of hungover
i think i puked but i couldve been a dream and i may have madeout with a 20 something guy infront of my managers...also possible dream.
Randomize
