i'm sure her mom would have loved to find out her daughter has herpes via facebook
I can't believe you let me try to pierce your nipple with a dart last night
Just turned elections for the sorority into a drinking game. Right on.
I'm high, and her 2,100 tagged pictures annoy me even MORE. I wish it had a google searchbar so I could type in "cleavage pics" to get to the point.
Balls are wasted. Waste are ballsted. Ballsd wasted
We all have our weaknesses that drive us crazy. We happen to have one in common, 21 year olds. Your secrets safe. Touch his penis.
I never knew so many sexual things could be done while wearing footie pajamas
the girl peeing in the stall next to mine has really cute shoes. on a scale of 1 to restraining order, how weird would it be to compliment them from in here?
I'm obsessing over hocus pocus right now. What if I change my Grindr profile to "come little children, I'll take thee away to a land of enchantment"
But that background check said 51...Omg. If I hooked up with someone that's my dads age.....
the moment when you open a dick pic with your mom in the car... On your moms phone... Of your dad... Scarred for life
And then she proceeded to tell us that blowing your brother made her feel like part of the family. At this point you were still pretending to be a cat. Need I give another reason she can't live with us?
Thanks for DJing my sex last night. You were on point 💜
My toothbrush tastes like captain morgan
I'm jealous
I don’t know how to sext. What do you say? What do you don’t say?
Just start quoting WAP lyrics.
Randomize
