I missed Saved by the Bell this morning, but Ashley in a later episode of Fresh Prince is keeping the morning wood alive.
I find it funny that "sexual harassment" contains the phrase "ass sex". Let me know what your thoughts are on the matter.
So he ended up having sex with me, but it was so awkward. When it was over, he went to the bathroom, and he came back and asked, "are you on your period or something? there's blood on my dick..." and i said, "well it was supposed to start today, nice surprise...i am so embarrassed." and he said ,"it's better than you queefing." and as soon as he said that, i queef the hardest and loudest i ever had.
please tell me that the half empty jar of cocktail sauce on the table has nothing to do with my missing seamonkeys
just got carried INTO the bar by 4 people. it's like watching my weekend in reverse.
So apparently the christmas orgy was a complete disaster
I just found out my mom named me after her fake ID from college...
I can't talk to her. I know entirely too much about her genitals to hold a conversation without mentioning them.
Made up a full house drinking game
On my way.
You are the funniest drunk Jew I know. Never in my life have I witnessed someone respond, "Is your dick kosher?" while being picked-up on.
He told me if he passed out to wake him by sitting on his face, and if he suffocated at least he would die happy. Found the one.
Either he pets my cat or this deal is null
Dude we need to hang out soon. I'm in the mood to get arrested again.
If I had your ass I would rule the world
he was wearing pj pants, thank you for not letting me go home with him
Randomize
