rhymes with "ouble enetration"
cant go down on her man, her vagoo reminds me of a face hugger from aliens
I'm playing with the baby I just found in your kitchen
I need Christmas break to be over. I'm tired of fucking my old High School girlfriends
i like him when i'm sober AND when i'm drunk.i've been searching for this my whole life
You destroyed the landscape if my vagina FOREVER.
I think 2012 will be the year I purposely put myself in awkward situations. Much like 2011 but really trying this time. Like fucking the little sister of a girl I already fucked and dating a chick that lives with her ex. It could be awesome or horrible.
Like wrapping my dick in silk, wrapping that in velvet, and putting it in a cloud. A warm, tight, wet cloud.
I saw that you sent me a photo and the first thing out of my mouth was "I swear if it's another photo of a dick poking out of a bubble bath"
He told me I smelled like peanut butter, pepperoni, and pure unbrieldled passion.
i'm gonna crowd surf you onto his dick
Who else will cuddle and watch the Bachelor with me then finger bang me during the rose ceremony
My Uber driver last night was driving a taxi and tried to charge me fare.
You didn't get in your Uber because your ex was driving, that was a legitimate taxi.
my vagina can't handle any more of our 4 day long smash bash. it should be like a holiday or something. should only happen once a year.
I will give him this, every time we go to the club he gets a stripper's actual number.
Randomize
