Just lost my virginity while listening to rick astley. torn between horror and jubilation
all thats left of you is your magnum wrapper on my dresser
I'm taking child development now so if you get pregnant i can raise your child no worries
so after he got his stomach pumped, he asked for a smoking room.
i just got so high i needed a buddy system to the kitchen
I wonder who the first pervert was, and if he would be proud of me for advancing his art form by so much
some guy just pulled a dress out of a fax machine...I have no idea what the hell is going on
I need to get a life, I am either crying at every glee episode or just wanting to blow rails off photos of us
This teachers last name is pfister and she did the fisting motion to help explain how to pronounce her name. This class might be good
I sleep texted my mom and asked her for a condom last night
If you enjoy dance recitals as much as I do, that's one shitty Father's Day...
Basically I will actually need a reindeer pulled sleigh to make it to all the penises in one night.
I've only hooked up with engineers this year and it may be the best future financial decision I've ever made
I've done dumber things than this for flimsier reasons. Come with. If I pull it off I need a witness, and if I fail I need an escape plan.
LISTEN TO ME! DONDE ESTA LA FUCKING VICODIN!
Randomize
