I'm bringing in a picture of a stranger on facebook to get my haircut. I have reached a new level of creepy.
Eating in charleston sc at a seafood place called "hymans". Like normal I had no problem finding it.
guy at the corner shop gets out a bottle of tequilla and a pack of malboro light whenever he sees me through the door. makes me feel loved and cared for
Vegas is awesome. Its like you have a kentucky accent girls automatically assume you don't have herpes.
Just don't have "pin the tail on the straight edge" as a party game... Please and thanks...
I'm taking tokes in the bath tub, come if you want, I'm naked and you have to bring chicken nuggets or else you can't come in
U thinks that's bad? He told me that he had to envision high school wrestling in order to bust a nut with some girl
Rick just drank rum out of a dog bowl after a dog already drank out of it.
He's the first man I've met that knows more about Harry Potter than I do. He shops at Goodwill and has a Game of Thrones cookbook in his apartment. This is my soulmate.
If your night didn't end with writing a witness report for the cops at a shwarma place, your night was probably less interesting than mine.
We ended up on their roof with our pants around our ankles shotgunning beers at one point.
Can you come get me? I woke up in the woods behind the Super 8. I have pizza.
When the theology professor asked me what touched me most about this trip to Rome, I guess "the guy from last night" wasn't the proper response.
Tonight I'm getting fucked up for America because Lord knows we need it.
He stumbled out of their hotel room and yelled, "I'M ON A STATEWIDE TOUR. I'VE BEEN IN KENTUCKY AND OKLAHOMA."
Randomize
