I should take him calling me "a freak of nature" after sex as a compliment, right??
apparently i was just sitting there with my shirt down holding my boobs saying "its ok. its all gonna be ok"
I'll give her a pass for the first one, but after the second threesome, she should have learned her lesson.
She just flushed the toilet with her head inside it...
How did "late lunch" turn into 8 solid hours of drinking??? I feel like death.
i remember going to sleep after the 4th time i threw up this morning and hoping i didn't have to again because then it would be uneven between saturday and sunday. my ocd is getting out of control
Yeah! I was just fired because there was an over hire and the new girl is hotter than me. Seeing as how the new girl is my baby sister I think punching my manager is excusable.
I just threw up in my front yard because my roommate was in the bathroom. Fuck New Years Day.
I was screaming out for people to gather the townsmen and the mayor so we could hang him
TGIFridays...stall number 1...drunk...send help
oh my god. picked the worst day ever to not wear underwear...
I'm just gonna stop you right there because there is, in fact, no such thing.
Yet he continued to eat cereal out of the glove compartment in my car.
I'm disease and pregnancy free. This is an Easter for the books!
Yeah just had sex and grub hub came right after he did. I’d say it’s a win.
Its like my group of friends and I are all dating and we're all just a bunch of Swingers, is that normal?
Randomize