I'm being pulled over???
For what!?!?!
??? I'm in a cab!!!!!
You were running around the house covered in syrup, with shredded down pillow feathers on your body screaming "AFLACK!" at everyone
fuck off i hope your children turn out to be republicans
The party theme was heirs and heiress's. Most guys came in polo shirts but he came as the "arch duke of vagina".
How sober do you have to be to donate blood?
If letting him bang me while i'm wearing reindeer antlers and a painted red nose isn't the christmas spirit, I dont know what is
I WALKED myself out of breath. And I'm lost I'm a Tim Hortons parking lot. That's how hungover I am.
You are so lucky that drugs are going to kill you before I do.
the party has pretty much ended, it's just 20ish of us jumping and grinding to music from some guy's phone in the corner.
just reminessing about the wedding and were they seriously to tight to serve a meal oorrrrrr was it just another one of my black-out-by-dinner drunks
the fact that you actualy have a 'black-out-by-dinner drunk' is a bit deserving..
tried to chug a glass full of ice cubes. went better then expected.
BING! You are now free to move about my panties. He just left for work.
He was supposed to visit me tonight but he decided to stop in Tacoma so now I'm sitting on my bed naked eating oranges and candy corn while I watch Parks and Rec.
Now I have to hook up with him tomorrow DURING THE DAY.
he spent an hour trying to rescue a bug from the sink. turned out to be a sesame seed.
Well, he was my lawyer and now we get drunk and hook up.
That explains the way he looks at you.
Randomize