i think i just puked on my phone
we live great lives
yeah, we don't understand. the wings losing for guys is like girls finding objects in their body..just weird and sad
I peed while puking? Even better
Yes you most deff did. Ultimate multi tasker you are
She was lying in bed moaning while eating a Snickers and masturbating.
It was the single greastest thing to happen to my dick ever
dude, never let a drunk girl playbite your dick. the doctor came in laughed and left.
It was one time. Now I have to constantly remind her my name is Jessica not Jizzica.
Well apparently "don't come inside of me" wasn't one of the English phrases he understood! On the bright side... At least he will get his green card for having an american kid!
Counseling BFF to break up with her BF. We will get that 3-way
I don't know what you're talking about but its dick galore in the tub. We will be getting poked tonight. Bring forks.
Don't judge them too harshly for getting kicked out of a strip club. Happens to the best of us.
You are the coolest girlfriend ever.
How long can I keep it classy to hook up in my old office building? Two more years? Does it get weird after 30?
my grandma just gave me a shoebox fulled to the top with tootsie rolls and condoms with a not that said "enjoy college, find a big cock" i'm not sure how I feel about this
I just typed "I've got a friend" and my phone autocompletes to "that's a dick appointment". What is my life.
you're not celebrating your 21st birthday right unless you give a male stripper a hand job, flash the bartender, and win a free vibrator.
Randomize
