I never noticed this but I have a beauty mark on my labia minora
Please tell me how you discovered this.
I was looking in the mirror snooping around
Just bought myself a coach diaper bag. I thought it would be perfect for school. the baby bottle holders are where i'm gonna put my booze
forced to watch US open for father's day. only perk is discovering dustin johnson...reeeeally hoping that this golf sex addiction thing is contagious
You put your shot glass in your waistband and then told me how convinent it was.
She slapped his drink out of his hand to get him to leave the bar while he and I were having an intense debate about the lyrics to mmmbop
I finally looked at the pictures from last night thanks for feeding me and pulling my pants up
Got high with dad and hunted squirrels in the basement. Is this seriously what my life has come to?
the fat lady is now rubbing her stomach and staring at me. I hate trains
She said if her future children dont have blue eyes she wont love them
He fell backwards into a full bathtub but didn't spill a single drop of the beer in his hand. What a pro.
I figured it out! The supermoon explains how I managed to have sex with 3 dudes in 3 nights without leaving the apartment.
I don't know what's worse the fact that I woke up with a clit piercing or the fact that I didn't pay for it.
I'll just bring the big suitcase this trip so I don't have to play wine bottle tetris again.
I guess "hi, I know your mom, she taught me in high school" is an effective pickup line
I ran into the marine at the grocery store. Its like my vag and his penis have this way of finding each other when I least want it.
Randomize
