so it turns out, not only do the doormen judge the girls I bring home, but they rate them.
I've never had a better reason to do blow of a Pittsburgh strippers ass than to try and keep pace with my dad.
well i fell out of the hot tub and tumbled down the hill and kicked a plant in the process.
i sent you a picture of beads you send me a picture of boobs how hard is this to understand
I guess I was trying to make a cheese sandwich, I had to change my sheets cuz I slept on it and the cheese melted all over me, Dave, and my bed
Hey remember that spam cooked in dr pepper we made? 10x better when the dr pepper is rum
I am going to buy some m-80's and keep a bucket of them in the bathroom. That way I can just depth charge the toilet before each time I use it. Lets see how those snakes like cheap Chinese explosives
he has to serve us drink and appetizers in his french maid costume for the Pirates game tonight. Bring everyone.
His mom walking in on us having sex was probably the highlight of the night
I feel like it could help stop wars and begin world peace and the continents can unite for one Monday because chicken fries come back today
Just so you know, it is really hard to rehydrate when everything is spiked with everclear.
He sent me a picture of his cock that seemed to indicate that we were still on good terms.
I don't think we should let her have pot anymore. She ate an entire package of bacon half-cooked and screamed that it was al-dente.
I gave her the last ten dollars to my name and bitch comes back with a six pack of bud light and a pack of sour patch kids
He’s disease free and drives a Porsche. What else does a girl need?
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