whjeg hajt iyt
say what?
wanna hang out?
Her little brother was home, so we had to hook up while playing hide and seek with him
we literally spent four hours convincing you that all 5 of your toes were there. no more everclear on a tuesday.
Just watched porn on a 60 inch plasma screen TV... So that's where the clitoris is
Only thing I know is apparently I danced with a bouncer and we got a ride back from a valet who was driving one of the cars he was supposed to be parking
Just found my old bop it. So many drinking game possibilities
Omg. I have a story to tell you later about that girl that just crawled on stage
I climbed out a window to pee last night because i thought i was locked in the room... Then crawled back in and went to bed. The poor neighbors.
Surely the maintenance men have seen worse than that condom right
I'm about to take my 7th shot and I have to to go to dinner with my grandma in an half hour. What is my life.
Today I found out that my boss keeps a breathalyzer on his desk for just these sort of shenanigans
HOW DID ALL OF US MISS THE OBVIOUS: I'LL SHAKE YOUR SPEARE
if anyone knows where my shirt is please let me know and if you know why I don't have my own shirt please also let me know. also do any of you know why I'm missing a bra wire?
On a scale from 1-10 how fucked up would it be to buy weed with my fafsa money?
It's a study aid
I can't believe it is only 1:30...I may have to stab myself with scissors for an excuse to go home...
Randomize
