Tell him ill love him long time
I'll assure him of it
Sponge bath it is.
walked into a party last night, i saw 3 ex gfs standing in a circle talking to each other...that's the quickest u-turn i've ever made in my life.
he was persistant. I supposedly owe him a bj from high school.
No one actually likes Tequila. They just accept it as a fact of life. Like hpv.
This just became a night full of adventures...and by adventures I mean hitting people with my car
Woke up and there was a kayak in the pool. Are you alive?
Question: would asking the hot guy from the grocery store to "beer me" his number be a poor decision?
And I'm bringing my coffee cup of wine.
You got banned for life from a $30 a night motel. What are you doing with your life?
You put THAT much Jager in me and expect me to realize when things are a bad idea?
He yanked my breathe right strip off in the middle of me riding him.
did i get sucker punched in the face last night or was our make-out session just that intense?
Today I made my parents proud-spent the afternoon floating around in their pool drinking beer-which I would ask my nephews to get for me out of the fridge
A drag queen just ate a dollar out of my ass. I don't know which one of us has hit rock bottom
Randomize
