Most awkward thing ever: Meeting your BattleShits opponent post war.
he came faster then a bring it on movie goes to dvd
No matter how fun it seemed the night before you will always regret taking those pictures, you will always regret eating as much as you did, but you will never regret the great lengths you had to got to get those bruises.
His texts read Like a 15 year olds diary.
i saw like six of her guido cousins in the jersey shore trailer alone. her family is having a dinner party for the premiere tonight.
My choices this week make me realize that I need to copyright the term "cock buffet"
He ended up letting us go, I think he just felt sorry for us. It's the only time that my night's gotten worse after I've taken my pants off.
Just invented taco cereal.
College is a time for personal growth. Meaning it's time to start using those pickup lines on randos at dive bars.
I just put fruit snacks in my sangria instead of real fruit. Its like freshman year all over again..
We couldn't afford sangria freshman year. We're lucky we had fruit snacks..
I just realized the only way to play Edward forty-hands is commando in a skirt. This intelligence kick is really doing me justice.
SOMEONE has to puke in the potted plants at an Xmas party. As their boss I felt it should be me.
Thank you for deleting me from Instagram. Also, I'm carrying your child. Happy new year!
The only thing I had in my freezer before today was patron and cheese.
Im playing a game I have to take a drink every time my gram asks me the same question hammered by 4 guaranteed
Randomize
