Afterall, it is the real San Francisco treat
She just sent me a txt where every word ended in "zzz", with about a hundred "!!!" and called herself "juicezzz". I need back up.
I woke up this morning and was hoping we drank enough last night to have a unicorn drawn on my wrist. Good News: We did.
Facebook is used to stalk your friends, Twitter is used to stalk celebritie=s, and Myspace is used to stalk underaged girls. Everything else is porn. T=he Internet in a nutshell.
hey everyone... booty call? my house tonight. bring friends to fuck my friends.
There's a litter of kittens in my bathtub and beer cans everywhere. I want my apartment key back.
She tried catching cigarette ashes on her tongue like snowflakes.
she called for a booty call so i sent mike as my stunt double
Chris threw beer can at guy. Guy ended up being a fighter. Chris got his eye socket broke. Fighter got hand re-broke. Chris is passed out. Fighter is in kellys bed. everybody won last night. I think.
This may be a weird question to ask someone who is 21 years old, but are you grounded?
I lost the back to your old name tag last night in a girls shirt. It got me a view of some titties though, I guess in some way you're still doing your brotherly deeds
Will keep you updated on the sexual orientation of my new guy
It's 4:30 AM and I just walked through a line of 10 deer without them freaking out. I am the campus deer king.
Hey I'm coming to get my gin do you want a good luck blowjob for your exam tmrw
AND I HAVE A NICE COCK! A STRIPPER TOLD ME SO IT MUST BE TRUE!
Randomize
