Why do bread and butter chips remind me of eating out your mom?
What's the kids name that was drinking stale beer and redbull out of the blender?
I just watched a guy pee from a second floor window onto the line of 100 people waiting to get in.
It's "your husband had his mouth on my vagina" awkward.
I dont know if this is a good time to tell you but im actually a freshman.. not a senior
we went 3 years between hookups and she got a lot better. Amanda's moving way up the booty call pecking order.
It was a perpetual wrestle for who got to be on bottom. Laziest hookup ever.
I saw a crackhead in a ballerina outfit riding a bike while waving her hands and one leg in the air. Never seen such talent in my life
We have such limited time together he literally sends me text messages that are like "I sent my roommates on an impossible quest, we have 15 minutes." it's that bad.
Owwww. A manager/ employee sex scandal that DOES NOT involve me! SCORE!!!
gin. gin. Gin. GIN GIN GINGINFFdJH
Lol woke up with mangoes in bed with me
Just got home from work. I'm going to change into sweats for a while before I have to wear normal pants to the party like I promised.
hey. this is your former cousin. you boned my best friend last night.
I threw up outside. Then I peed got off the toilet and threw up. While I threw up u pulled up my pants. Not my best moment
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