This is evicking siegelnvs
Im sorry?
This is fucking ridiculous*
i'm starting to get pissed at how pandora is trying to force coldplay on me
i always forget guys have bellybuttons
im naked on webcam to her boyfriend, but im playing neopets at the same time, so its all evened out
Hey for future reference vodka can not be substituted for water when shaving your legs
Some Russian dude just came up to us and I'm pretty sure he offered his girlfriend to have sex for 80 bucks. Whoever said porn movies were unrealistic.
i woke up to something itchy on my head. it was his mustache. he fell asleep face-plant style on the side of my head. WTF?
Driving by his house every hour is not stalking, it's a reconnaissance mission... How else can I confront him
Dude cabbage spilt on the floor, and now danielles rolling it. Happy st party's day.
and then we all passionately sang "what if god was one of us" until everyone passed out in the grass
I woke up on top of his counter next to a pot of boiling water and an empty package of ramen... what happened to the ramen, we will never know.
We play beat the clock every morning. When the alarm goes off, she hits snooze and drops her panties. If I can't finish in time to beat the snooze, she jumps in the shower and I've gotta jerk off.
She just spat tequila at me... Like a fountain... A broken fountain
How many drinks/blunt hits do you think I could get if I wore an "it's my birthday" shirt
like I'd leave you in a situation like that..pfft. what kinda friend do you think I am?
...a stoned one.
Randomize
