I love you!
You're insane
Fuckin crazy man! Seriously though I think if you would have me I honestly seriously think about marrying u!
Alright now lets video chat so I can xshow u my dick! Hahahaha
and when i put it inside her she yelled "welcome aboard!"
On this egg donor form, it asks "In the past 5 years, have you had sex for drugs or money?" It only gives a yes or no option and no place to explain myself. What do I do?
Yeah the sex got weird after I said "who's your daddy?" and she actually moaned her dads name.
you kept typing in answers.com, why are the state police calling my house, expecting an answer
His facebook status was woke up with a whale ..... Captain AHAB IS BACK !!!!!
He wanted to put Kesha on after he came in my mouth. I had to draw some sort of trashy, gay line.
i dont care if it was her birthday. if she leaves me with a half rack of budweiser and her boyfriend obviously shits gonna go down.
I inspected his penis with a mini flashlight to check for visible stds...he was clean
Oh, I'm just lighting tennis balls and WD-40 on fire, what are YOUUU doing?!
IM A DRUNK BIRTHDAY CLEOPATRA MESS. CELEBRATE THAT BITCH
I just put fruit snacks in my sangria instead of real fruit. Its like freshman year all over again..
We couldn't afford sangria freshman year. We're lucky we had fruit snacks..
I think that's why god made me a woman. Bc it's harder to slap people in the face with a vagina.
Sorry my phone died because I decided charging my vibrator was way more important
I want a dick in my left hand and a Crunch Wrap Supreme in my right hand.
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