she said she missed her period, but is going to six flags... think im safe?
God. I'm so broke I don't even have a dollar to snort my adderall through.
you were crying and trying to give advice to people.. that's was a new level of drunk for you
His dad asked what he was doing so he texted his FATHER a picture of me wearing his shirt in his bed.
I can't even tell you how many rave sticks I tore apart with my teeth last night.
My eyes feel like they're throwing up and I am the only human on campus
Well the streets were closed, so it was okay for me to just lay down for a little bit.
As an added realisation of today. If we used the last time I got laid as a conceiving date I would have a two week old baby. It's been too long...
Best case scenario I do a bunch of dirty things to you, blow your mind and you enjoy it. Worst case I stare at you, poke at you, smile and droll on myself, you laugh.
I'm abstinent now
Oh, is this one of the times when you're serious?
the kid next to me in math class is drawing gay porn. it's good, but that is beside the point
I guess the weekly d&d orgies are treating you well
Ripping out my IUD in Dave and busters bathroom
So you can text and rub it at the same time? Bravo.
I can do anything and masturbate, if I truly wanted to.
I thought the dude was just really enjoying his piss but apparently he was jerkin off into the urinal.
Randomize
