I just met a guy from Australia at the bar. I asked him what it was like down under and he told me if I went home with him he'd let me find out. I love Australians.
discovery: the myth about swedish girls giving good head? not a myth.
Listen, I'm 30. If it doesnt involve a super soaker and some chicken wings, you can count me out.
someone just broke into my class and invited everyone to the bar ...now we're filling out a police report. awesome.
Its piss that you smell... I borrowed that shirt last week. Sooo, wanna grab some laundry soap on your way home? And good luck on your date.
I popped a zit on your vagina. Don't say I never loved you.
At least we kept it together. It's people like him who yell at bushes that give acid a bad name
I'm handcuffed to the toilet. Don't ask
I think my vagina is going to steal my keys and drive over there.
Hopefully she would park on my face.
She told me about it right after. She said she was scared I would be disappointed. And I was, but I pretended not to be. Which pretty much sums up our relationship.
But the real question is how many people didn't see my dick last night?
Also just throwing this out there I don't think anyone who brings another girl back to your bed to share with you can qualify as a frigid bitch
We helped him hit the bowl to the point that he didn't even have to move
Idk man, we spent like 20 mins arguing about the moral ambiguity of fucking in someone else's car
Also we're getting drunk and sledding down Caroline street. See you soon.
Randomize
