apparentely "Beer Pong Champ" is not a profession, no wonder they havent called me back......
told ya
Girls only wine night turned into a sloppy drunk lesbian orgy again
keep it on the DL tho cause i dont want it getting out and it coming off like i kidnapped her or something
No see this is how It goes: guys will fuck virgin girls. But girls don't really want to fuck virgin guys. So you're good have no fear.
I've hooked up with 3 different guys already this week...don't tell me I haven't been a productive member of society
you started introducing us as kentucky and gentlemen
I hope there's a soldier with a Bedazzler just going to town right now.
she's like the billy mays of hookups...touch my boobs and i'll throw in this blow job ABSOLUTELY FREE
It might have taken me 30 minutes but I finally finished the toast I made. That hungover.
I broke out the Krispy Kreme, and am possibly having random internet sex in less than an hour. I think I got this breakup under control.
A gay guy went down on me in the club bathroom and then fixed my makeup for me
its gonna be a great night
So you don't take a regular pic with her, but you take a selfie with her ass. Interesting...
So hungover and decided to eat a burrito and a pot brownie for dinner, this is what adulthood looks like.
He's gone. He left a note but all it says is "Dear Neil" followed by a drawing of a hand flipping the bird in the direction of a butt.
what happened last night?
we watched you eat an entire bag of dorritos in the pouring rain... you refused to come inside
Randomize
