One girl and one boy is just not enough.
Operation extremely regretful is in full effect
just looked up how to break up with someone nicely on google. glad to know im not the only one who looks up this shit.
If he starts "inventing" things cut him off. The last thing he invented was chocolate chip green beans and he destroyed my kitchen
she played "i just wanna get married" by jagged edge while we were having sex. why cant i avoid stage 5 clingers
I made a tournament bracket for the girls that Im talking with.
Did I actually say goodbye last night or did I just poison you with vodka and disappear?
Who knew that "When in doubt, pelvic thrust" would end up being the best motto ever? In other news, I think I may have joined roller derby.
Never thought I'd say this but the maple syrup flavored vodka probably wasn't our best idea
I feel like the fact that I slept with someone who dresses up like Batman a few times will never be lived down.
You asked me if I was judging you for being drunk, and if I can hypnotize you make sober.
I'm toasting stale bread and thinking of you
Is that a sex thing?
I mean, you've had my nipples in your mouth now, so I think we've reached a certain level of friendship.
Thanks for being my best friend so I can use you as an alibi to my family while I'm out getting some dick in my face.
I think I'm the first girl to break a bed with a guy, without even having sex with him while doing so.
Randomize
