you are the weird ass hat to my lady gaga
I need to surround myself with more reliable stoners...
Dancing like a fucking crazy person to jai ho with a snow ball in her hand. Snow days make her go nuts.
his mom walked in, looked at me, sighed n nsaid 'when are u gonna learn' n walked out
Things I woke up with this morning: half a mcmuffin, orange hair, one shoe and a friendly german man. Tequila was a brilliant idea.
i wasn't gonna shower then i remembered i slept in my own piss
Ya he's alive. Apparently he's been drinking Naty and listening to Unbreak My Heart on repeat all day.
Wrote my name backwards on the test and asked for extra credit points. Late start booze days are my new favorite thing.
She's calming us down by shoving oreos in our mouths
Whoever labeled dysfunctional a bad thing obviously never saw this frinedship coming.
I really couldn't care less what she looks like. That's why The Lord Our God gave us doggy-style.
Any idea why the fuck i would replace all the music on my ipod with the fucking Goosebumps theme song?!?
Apparently drunk you is really nostalgic?
I'm at the store buying a new phone cause I pissed all over mine last night. Drunk me is expensive as shit.
I may have interrupted sex but im bringing them both to McDonalds. Am I not the greatest older sister ever?
The date did not go well. Turns out I once set her brother on fire.
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