sunday morning discovery: something purple, smelly, and sticky my hair. any suggestions?
So the coke mirror was perfectly angeled at my face right when i woke up this morning. I now know how I'd look on intervention.
And I was the only one who felt it was dangerous to set the tv and blender on the ledge of the hot tub
He picked me up from the airport wearing nothing but a trench coat and a bow on his dick
I had no idea a 5'8 girl could fit entirely on her knees in front of the passenger seat of a Sunfire, but I am very happy to now have that knowledge.
The only reason we got away with streaking last time was cuz we had those miner hats
honestly, i'm just crying in the kitchen naked and eating salsa
I almost shit my pants in anger over your moral sanity.
It sounds miserable..I have to wear a dress and it's a cash bar?
Finished watching the entire first season of mighty morphing power rangers. Now I have nothing. Not even a life.
Just got kicked out of two hot tubs. We were naked the second time. So awkward getting out in front of the security guard.
Strip club, what strip club did I eat a steak at? That's the appropriate question
I had cheese pancakes which is pretty much just melting cheese in a frying pan and then eating it except youre in denial that your life is a wreck
I walked in the kitchen and heard her saying "We could have been so good together" as she caressed an egg with her cheek.
she gave me a ride on the back of her motor scooter and i swooned so hard
omg it's like all of your grease 2 fantasies come true i'm so happy for you
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