hipster in red sally jessy raphael glasses inside. kick her.
So he sent me a text that said "say hi to your vajayjay for me"
Was there any message he wanted you to relay to your asshole?
Laughlin, where retired strippers come to die.
he yelled 'rock me amadeus!' when he came
i love that song!
NOT THE POINT
Well. I went to a frat party where they mixed gin and Mountain Dew. My kingdom for some olives and vermouth.
Well it's official, last night I hooked up with the third girl from the apartment downstairs.
Dude that's a hat trick!
I know, I tossed my hat on the floor as I was walking out.
Nothing says "forever alone" like receiving a friendship bracelet from your parents.
My walk of shame was four miles long and I had to stop for a water break. I am the picture of class.
Like I'm getting finger banged and my family is making cookies in the kitchen. Talk about terrifying
There is a reason my most meaningful relationship since 2012 has been with Duracel...
They should make eskimo sister bracelets. OMG WE NEED BRACELETS WITH IGLOOS ON THEM.
Does fucking him in the back of the car with the sun roof retracted count as star gazing?
im shaving my vagina and listening to frank sinatra, im coming over after
First she snuck beer into the movies and then proceded to give me a handjob in the dark theatre. I think I'm in love
only 4 hours until nug lovin time
excuse me?
nug lovin. lovin nugs.
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