She's perfect. Funny, gorgeous, 3 tats, been through a lot, bright. I'm in love.
i'm forgoing the post-coitus cuddling sesh to ask u this :when he says he loves me and all i can think to say is either "cool" or "i love boning you," what do i do?
True or false: I did not bring home a 28 year old last night.
True? Did she teach you things?
She taught me the meaning of awkward goodbyes at 530 am.
theyll ask where you are and ill say on a date crying in a sombrero
like that time i did too much ghb at gay pride
The twins are whispering in turkish together. I think I did something bad last night.
I told him "thank you for wearing a turtleneck yesterday, I no longer have a strong erg to have sex with you. " He is no longer speaking to me.
Aaaaand I just watched him face plant in front of the taxi. This is why we don't invite him to margarita night.
It's time for everyone's favorite Wednesday night game... WHEEL OF. VODKA!!!!!
C'mon pople!!! THursday afternoon isnot gonna drinkin itself!!!
I am going to tweet NASA until they put me into space
Those rocketship riding assholes need the common man
I have bite marks all over my ass. Is that an acceptable excuse for missing class?
Remind me to tell you the story of the fuzzy condom
Is is gay if I donloaded Grinder to see if my roommate is gay?
You -do- realize there are other things to talk about than just how different parts of you smell like pussy, right?
I’M DRUNK AND EXCITED.
Randomize
