i want you to feel like i'm letting you into my heart, not just my vagina.
as soon as you compare a person to an animal, all sexual interest is out the window
I was just making a list of the girls i have slept with and i can't remember your sisters name
i didnt like the question options for my yahoo account..so i made up the question and it was "favorite bathroom to shit in"
Anything that's based on a blow job I'm in favor of.
this is the fifth day in a row i've woken up after 3 pm, hungover. I might die when snowmageddon is finally over and we have to go back to class. my liver wont know how to take it.
I need your advice and before you say it, no, it cannot be solved by a blow job
You clearly don't understand the power you wield with your mouth.
repeat this after me. period at the beach is better than baby at the beach. breathe. and: period at the beach is better than baby at the beach.
Man, jail baloney is awful.
i would one night stand the shit outta him
Dude. She came to my room in nothing but a trench coat. Took it off and said, "you like" in her Costa Rican accent. God I love college.
You FaceTimed me to show me he was sucking your tit
I think we've gotten passed awkward... the day I woke up at the palms and ur getting eaten out by the dude who just fucked me on the balcony.
I'm to childless and to single to be asking myself why I'm so sticky
I’m vetoing meatball margaritas right out the gate. We can’t have people throwing up again!
Randomize
