He told me i was the nicest person he's ever arrested for DUI
i bet even starving children in Africa take the crust off their poptarts
Whatever, its basically a crime against humanity to miss an andre power hour so she'll get what's coming to her.
its great to know that you distinguish your relationships on whether you can cum on someone's face
And im sorry for wishing your girlfriend gets genital warts.
Going to the market. I need some nachos and a serious re-evalution of my life.
Bring a bathing suit for the glitter slip n slide
I dropped my blunt out the window of a moving car by accident, tell me everything will be okay
You climbed out your own window and walked in the front door..
He called yelling about whhhhhhiskey and enchiladas I heard sirens in the background last time I talked to him b
They were supposed to legalize it when there was a chance someone might actually propose to me. I'm appealing this bullshit.
So who left their underwear on a lamppost in my aunt's backyard
Executive decision.... we are cuddling naked
Sex on the trampoline with your two best friends cheering you on: PRICELESS.
That man fucks like a champ. The sex was so good I did him again in the morning just to be sure
Randomize
