all the sharp corners in my house are covered with litter foam blocks. al set for partying
He gets a blow job; I get my oil changed free of charge. And that way I only see him every 2500 miles.
My kindergarten teacher served me... All coming full circle
After he came, I wiped my mouth on my baby blanket. I could feel nana rolling over in her grave.
Direct quote from her that tipped me off I was getting some: "I want to jump on his shoulders and wrap my legs around his face"
All those movies are bullshit, there is no way to run down a line of parked cars, they`re too far apart. my faces hurts so much right now
Must say, as a couple, she and I are thrilled that our pretend lesbianism has paid off.
I feel as bad as you right now. I'm about to use one girls car to go see another one
Fuck ya. But normally I drove one girls car picking up a different girl while texting another girl lol
if i bang your brother are we still cool?
Would it be weird to bake him a cake that says "sorry I peed on your bed"?
I didn't have time to wash my hair yesterday. Ended up spraying some Febreeze on it.
I told him I was going outside to throw up and I ended up passing out in the front yard in my underwear for 45 minutes. When I walked back inside he said "where have u been?". My husband ladies and gentlemen
just saw those girls we met the other night. i happen to be wearing a bunny suit and driving your smart car. i think its safe to say thats a no go situation.
I have been adopted by a clan of drunken skinny dipping tourists.
I don't want to be flamboyant (says the guy who bought a hot pink suit to be a flamingo for Halloween)--but I don't mind being a little extra.
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