She has some nice fakeys. She is also an exotic entrepreneur.
i feel like i'm waiting in line to date brett michaels
i just hope all the shady shit stops so i can let him into my pants
He told me to fart on his lap because the vibrations turned him on
Im watching hello kitty on qvc debating if its a good idea to cook bagel bites on my space heater
for halloween i should be pregnant. what is scarier than that?!
I woke up to find her cooking breakfast wearing nothing but my Nuggets jersey. I don't think this could end better.
so i never found you. but i found vodka. so its kinda the same
I'm so high I feel like I'm pedaling a bicycle but I'm laying on the couch. My body might be vibrating. I made soup.
I'm currently making some changes in my life. If you don't hear from me anymore, then you're probably one of them. Or I'm dead.
Thats not real though. Slash there are other extenuating circumstances to lead me to believe dick is wanted
HOLY FUCK I SPELLED EXTENUATING RIGHT ON THE FIRST TRY. IM THE BEST DRUNK NA
My relationship: I'm wearing batman panties and a tiara right now trying to get laid and he's doing dishes.
Now it's a thing. He's kind of a creeper and now he's lotioning me. This is going to turn into a Buffalo Bull situation.
I've decided to have sex with him one more time to make sure I don't like him
WTF. I was 99% sure I went straight home last night. I just woke up hugging a chair, and my tux pocket has a flask filled with what I think is red bull and gatorade. This has to be your doing.
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